My Thread of Hope

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When I think about the last few months I am drawn to reflect on God‘s unwavering grace.  I have had moments of complete Joy, I have seen the way the crest of a wave  disperses on a shell filled beach, instantly changes the heart of a child from excitement to awe, unbridled wonder.  I have shared tears within my own private four walls, over the loss in a season of my life.  Knowing that regardless of the future that this season will never come again, never the same.  The next, something anew fortified, stronger, weaker… different.

Seasons of life they teach us not only the lows that we can feel, also the strength we  gain through trusting in God.  Reach inside pull out the courage, love and grace that you never knew was there.  This season has brought me through another ten amazing christian novels.  My love for the written word has grown over and over as I read new pages new authors.  I find new places in my heart that needed to grow and the words I read became the seeds.

It’s just a Season people say; you will get through it.  Trust in God with all your Heart and He will lead your path straight.  I believe this sitting here on my couch typing this blog, yet when I think about going to the kitchen to refill my coffee, or to head to the office to grab a book, I feel stranded, alone, forgotten….  It is humbling to go from running in the water with your children, to wishing you had spent the last five years buffing up your upper body strength.  Just so you could lift your inoperative body into a wheelchair, or on to a medical bed.  I cherish the nights with my spouse, walking down the hall and kissing my children goodnight or singing the song they Love to Hate to wake them in the morning.  Yet I have stumbled again, no rhyme or reason.  This time both of my legs have decided to leave on hiatus.  Upstairs is a current memory, one I want to make a reality again, now.  Yet in the midst of this stumbling, I choose to Follow, in the midst of this I choose to surrender again.  ~ Take My Life and Let It Be, All for You and for Your Glory, Take My Life and Let it Be Yours”  – (Chris TomlinThis song plays in my head like the constant rhythm of the waves urging me to never forget even if my footsteps are nothing but faint memories in the present, God in His mighty Love, in His endless calling for us to follow, is the strength within me!  I am a grain of sand in His hands of mercy.  He is not testing me to pull me farther from Him, He does not create the pain the suffering or the endless questions and longing for a reason Why??? Now Please hear me, for if I am anything I am only that because of He who has made me!  My God is standing in the Gap between my lack of strength and my earnest urge to survive, persevere and be a shinning light for someone walking in a world where darkness seems to have taken hold.

Today is a gift.  I cherish the smells, sounds and laughter I am enjoying.  The other night My Husband our youngest daughter and I had a small family movie night.  We watched The Life of Pi Wow, what a movie, book – This story of Life, Loss and the gift of believing in God who will never forget you even if you don’t understand how He could have placed you in the situation you are in. Movies that share this are a blessing in today’s society.  God shows over and over how He never abandons us and when we continue to surrender not long for ourselves to be in complete control.  God provides in His timing always in His unique marvelous ways!   – A small side note: Although the movie was rated PG be sure your child is ready for some graphic animal violence scenes before renting the 3D version. (i.e.) I give the movie **** 1/2 stars only because they had two small errors in filming (yes I catch that small stuff).  Spending time together watching a movie or eating dinner, these moments are a treasure I will hold with both hands and a full overflowing heart.

Today keeps tearing at the fabric I have knitted around my heart.  I have learned over time that trials regardless of the reasons they will help us grow are faith and bring us closer to the creator, we only have to be open to His gift.  I being human, being an emotional variety of the female gender, find that trials can make you stronger or leave you weaker.  So many times in my life I’ve been told “In this Business, In this situation, In light of these circumstances, Now that you have survived, overcome, achieved, been awarded, invited too, in today’s times : YOU NEED TO GROW A THICK SKIN”  I just want to clarify, this blog is my way of sharing a set of unforseen circumstances in my life.  Those circumstances have given me the nudges I have needed to grow and learn a multitude of things I had not known before.  I see God in the wind now, I see God in the flowers outside my window, that I planted there five years ago.  I have enjoyed watching it grow.  Today I am not able to go outside touch it, take photos of the bees burrowing inside the buds, drenching their bodies with a fine perfect layer of pollen to carry back to the hive and dropping some on many needed plants along the way.  I am able to see them through the window, I praise God for that.  I will not “Grow a Thick Skin” not any thicker that it is today.  I believe wholeheartedly that God created me this way as a perfect representation of one unique part of Him.  For we in the Glory of our imperfect selves are made in His image, by His hand.  I believe He sees our/my image as a perfect reflection, not something that needs hardening by the trials we are given, but rather to watch us bloom and carry our own pollen/knowledge to the next trial in our life, only to drop pollen, drop love, friendship, wisdom, and experiences to those around us along the way.  So I use this blog to share books that I love, items I have come across that I have found indispensable and believe that you would find indispensable as well.  I also will share some of my trials and my experiences with you.  In that, perhaps you may experience encouragement, knowledge, wonder and a growth of your own Faith.

This is my place of refuge, a place to share little pieces of life that I am unable to express any other way.  Perhaps this will shed some light – I woke this morning to my hands being so swollen that they matched my legs and feet, swollen bubbles with knobs on the end for digits.  My arms are unable to operate the wheelchair well.  I found the desire to cry almost unbearable.  It is not so much my body giving me a war I am still learning to fight, it is that my children had to see mom struggle to pack their lunch and send them off to school.  Rather than lose myself in the fear of this situation, I chose to go to the window open it wide and watch the birds gather worms, the wind rustle up the underside of the growing magnolia.  I could smell the rosemary on the breeze and when I leaned forward-looking hard I could barely see that our blueberry bushes are starting to bloom.  I watched God this morning!  Instead of surrendering to the tears over fear,  I instead surrendered myself to God’s earthly wonderland, watching it work piece by piece in perfect unison.  I’m blessed to be part of that plan, God’s plan in all it’s wonder.  The trial I am currently struggling with will teach me something I was unaware of before.  I believe I will see God’s face even clearer for the journey.  I will see a rainbow and cry my tears that God loves us, will never leave us; NEVER.  He has given me strength to share my struggles with you.  From the nudges He has sent my way recently, I have found the courage to share with you.  May my journey give you strength in your life whatever you may be walking through with God now.

Blessings, Jenn

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Happy Sunday 3.24.2013

Well after 18 months of everything under the sun, I/We made it back to church last Sunday and we are going today!  I have to say it is much-needed.  I pray I make the connections that I was unable to make last time, so that if things go south, I have a Church Family to lean on!.

The Rain on the windows was beautiful today even the birds thought it light for we watched a Bluejay and a Robin hunting for worms for at-least ten minutes.  These are the moments I savor.

God has carried my for what seems like forever – I am glad I am able to start to give back in small ways to the Kingdom, by readings, writing and sharing the Good News!  I say if it were not for the love of church in the South, I may never of heard the knocking that was happening on my door.  Its been a little over thirteen years now, Wow!  I would not trade one moment.

I have learned everything happens in perfect timing – His Timing.  I have learned that surrendering everyday brings peace beyond understanding.  I have learned that family is a word used for those you can share your love of God with!!

Off to Church I go – A little note for you – May God Bless you with the Love and Charity He has blessed my family with, and May He was their in your darkest hour.  Remember you will not see Him there until the rainbow is shinning on the other side of the valley!  Oh but such a beautiful site.  That being said I will continue to Praise Him in this storm, knowing His perfect timing is at work in my Life!

Blessings to All!

A Little peace of Heaven
A Little peace of Heaven

Tapestry of God Web for our lives

As I was reading a book last night a quote stated ” Three lone thread in a tapestry without a clue about the magnificent pattern God was weaving.” Quest for the Nail Prints a Novel – Don Furr pg 128

It just blew me away. First I believe that we are not the only lone souls, weaved into a magnificent tapestry by God.  I believe in my soul my heartbeat, in my love of life my love of faith my yearning for knowledge of God.I believe that each person that is set upon this on this earth christian or a life yet to find Christ will be weaved through and throughout His mighty tapestry. Weaved in, in a way that leads only to inevitable glory of His mighty Kingdom.  Perhaps I am still fresh in my faith and am star struck by the Love and Grace. He so freely gave, to me, to all. Especially on the cross. The thief at His side who said ” I will never see the promised land for I have sinned too much – and Jesus of Nazareth, spoke in words only a messiah on a cross dying a horrible death could say said, son for you have seen your ways were wrong and repented, tonight you will be with me in the promised land.”   Wow A small word on a death-bed and all is forgiven –

That Moment when He said you will be with me and the Father in Heaven tonight. – I believe He was not only being true, so honest it was above miraculous. Though people must understand Christ is a sounding board for forgiveness in your hour of need. Though, He is not an answer to the, I will sin all my life and use this  “Forgive Christ” as a scape goat, as a pass, as a way from the fires of Hell, into eternal peace at deaths last moment.  Repenting is a part of the spirit and comes for deep within. the thief had that repentance.  I do not believe many that choose the easy option will or do.

I say that for I have to repent each day and I am yet a mother with three amazing children and a husband who is more kind to may than the Robin is to her hatchlings in early spring.  It takes time effort and real honest, true belief and surrender to learn honest repentance.

The thought that we are part of a tapestry of Gods/Christs tapestry for the magnificent pattern He is creating makes me feel even more resolute in the forward motion of my dreams my surrender, my following my hearts leading. For in my heart I believe the Holy Spirit not only dwells buts speaks.

tomorrow I shall speak to the tapestry I think He is creating in me tonight I leave you with a question… What do you thing He is creating in you?

For we are all the vine and without each other we are …..

 

Blessings,

Jenn

 

A new book – I am starting my Quest

I received a book “Quest for the Nail Prints” by Don Furr. According to is cover;
Three ordinary people are chosen by God for an extraordinary experience, one so incredible that even they have a hard time believing it is real. Through unrelated circumstances, the three travelers find themselves sharing a journey to the Holy Land when suddenly there are thrust back in time nearly two thousand years, coming face-to-face with the rugged radical Nazarene known throughout the land as Jesus of Nazareth.

This is the story of how a personal encounter with the living Christ and his time creates the journey of a lifetime!

I have been personally changed by the way Don writes in an honest real human voice. I cannot put it down! There is a hole through the middle of the book, it has a great explanation one that you should experience yourself. Find your heart with Christ feel the sins being washed clean as the blood is spilled I for one am struck in the deepest part of my soul, this book is a testament to Faith , Hope and Love.
I hope to talk with Don and share more soon until then go get yourself s copy.
Quest for the Nail Prints

Also The Book Network The Book Network has a great group on the Quest as well as the Nails. They have amazing conversation. Don’t miss out!

Blessings to each of you – glad to be back writing again. Please check out this book and let me know what you think! Jenn

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Wanting to find the answer to a question of Fear

Christmas 2012

It has been two Christmas‘ now that I have had the pleasure of being confined to a wheelchair. Meaning it has been two years that I have not gone to Church, Slept in the same bed as my husband, ran at the park with my kids, been Jenn. Most everyone probably has seen the slow progression of me going from Jenn with a real positive attitude and Hope. To an overweight and continually gaining woman who does what is to be done and that is about it. THe monster under the bed Syringomyelia and a spinal nerve disorder that has decided to wreak havoc on my body. Then I let it decay my mind and body. I am afraid to leave my home. I am huge, in comparison to what I have been all of my life.  I’m scared of the ramifications of the medication and the longevity of this situation. Everyone wants an update.  I don’t like the question for the answer is Steady the Course.  I am not sure what I am giving back anymore and what I am giving to my children.  Sure I noticed something and sence positive things have happened with one of our children.  That’s me; I over analyse, and question everything.  I also point at a cupcake shaped like a tree and ask my husband if he would like an elephant.  My mind doesn’t want to be witty and smart, catching all the little things nobody else notices.  Sometimes because they are just things, but mostly because they are inconsequential, yet intrigued by them.  I loved being able to know the outcome of a movie.  Now I would like to know the way to sleep.  Its funny the way I Hurt at night, the pain from my body yes; but the pain from loneliness, fear, trapped, I feel so large in my body, I am cold and hot all the time. I don’t know my God anymore and for the sake of my life I need Him!  I need four things :

  1. My God – an awareness that will strengthen me. A mentor prayer partner
  2. My Husband, I need to see Joy in His eyes again – He has had So Much Two Years – I am afraid I am putting too much on Him it is not right.
  3. My Family to know how much I love them and their prayers help. Especially when my smallest one asks “are you feeling better today? can you move your foot?” He is aware and young so young, but he believe God will heal me
  4. I need my Life back – Some version I need to WALK

I have needed to write so much, this is all I can say now.  I will try to sleep for an hour before the day begins.

I am stronger than I could be and weaker than I always have been. – I don’t know what or How but if you can shine a light please aim it this way.

Jenn

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May all things come together in time

Today Jesus is smiling on us, don’t you feel it!!! May you Holiday Joy overflow into friendships, random acts of kindness and pure Love. We all need each other, lets prove our convictions.
Let us Love not in word or speech, but in truth and action. 1 John 3:18
Blessings may they flow abundant. Jenn

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Book Review Preview: Wally Armstrong – Practicing the Presence of Jesus – Expereriencne the Gift of His Friendship

I being asked to do a review on this book: practicing the presence. of Jesus. Experience the gift of His Friendship From the forward by Ken Blanchard on, something inside stirred. I found this not  a personal improvement book nor a Strong hold I will make you a believer novelette. Rather in fine form this is a well pictured piece of the vine placed on paper so those untouched by the branches will feel the power one chapter can give and as I  dive in. I find personal Experiences funny. They question you placement in a spatial relationship to an experience, they ask without words if you are knowledgeable enough to speak to that experience, finally even probe the sentiment does anyone cares about your opinion when it relates to an experience. Harsh but ever so true.

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Here is a a small taste~a quote before the contents to give you a taste of the

translucent yet vibrant review to come:

Thanks be to Thee, my Lord Jesus Christ,

for all the benefits Thou hast given me,

for all the pains and insults

which Thou hast borne for me.

O Most merciful Redeemer, Friend and Brother,

may I know Thee more clearly,

love Thee more dearly,

follow Thee more nearly,

day by day.

Amen.

-ST. RICHARD OF CHICHESTER

I hope you are as excited as I am for the upcoming review. This book has given me wise on-site, strong reproach to daily failures and triumphs. I will take great pleasure in reviewing this beautiful book.

Blessings ~Jenn

Surviving Beyond The Police Do Not Cross Line

English: An image of Psalm 23 (King James' Ver...
English: An image of Psalm 23 (King James’ Version), frontispiece to the 1880 omnibus printing of The Sunday at Home. Scanned at 800 dpi. Français : Illustration du Psaume 23 (version autorisée par le roi Jacques), en frontispice de l’édition omnibus du Sunday at home. Version numérisée à 800 dpi. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

 

Today I believe the image of the police line do not cross is very raw. It feels honest and true. I cannot pinpoint the time or place, where survival turned into a primal need for me. I feel I need to find a place where you don’t have to survive, to exist. The need to carry out emotion for anyone is gone.

 

I am so very sincere when I say, before the incident all I wanted was to enjoy this life,laugh, cry.  I even was to emotional sometimes, but in a weird type of reverse affirmation, I would do anything – you don’t want to know the things and likes I went to make people happy.  “When you can so readily overlook your own wickedness, why are you more clear-sighted than the eagle or serpent of Epidaurus, in spying out the failings of your friends?” I gave somebody my car. I paid rent for people.  Deep down the desire to have someone (God )fill my void manifested by me trying to make sure everyone around me had everything they needed. Even in work, stay up late, try to do the best of the best.  I know this is not what God ever desired. I fell into a circle of affirmation do for you affirmation do for you. I don’t want affirmation, I just want the small group of people who really know me to Love me for being Jenn Quirky as I am. Wanting everyone around me happy is not an obtainable goal nor rational.  It is just the fragments of space left over from the cycle of giving I lived in for so long.

 

I am now seeking God to offer the happiness that is the vail of happiness I think will disappear. So will exploring my cycle of happiness with God accomplish a calm within me. Or change my character to one that finds happiness by serving Him in all things and rejoicing in the happiness that manifest and seeps deep into the part of my soul the Holy Spirit Dwells? I know the answer for the moment I met the Holy spirit my heart changed and so did I.  Forever I want a disciple to be, as my calling. I sometimes say I was a liking to Paul throwing stones at God only to fall at his feet weeping for days.So I asked myself?

 

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? Matthew 7:3. I have the plank of illness, but no-one can pull it out of my eyes. I am working on reading scripture to myself until the plank becomes a sliver and that sliver I remove with grace. Sometimes I feel I have a lost family I reach out yet they are in a world of calm and understanding. they see not the pain that one can experience or the exhaustion that has no meaning at all.  I find their love pure and true, they have just been lost in the desert many years. God please give me the understanding and perseverance to have the strength to pray for their eyes to see even at my own sufferage.- this hurts the most – “mom did you get my 3 calls and 4 emails?  all about different important things. even today a sister can drink the nectar of those who know of your love but are not dwelling in the pool of utopia. Pain they say is just in your head wondering a path that has many diverse roads, each will take you to a place, the road signs are all but lost.  If I find the road to the flame, perhaps this scripture will will help put out the flames

 

Psalm 32:3-6 The Message

 

When I kept it all inside,
my bones turned to powder,
my words became daylong groans.

 

The pressure never let up;
all the juices of my life dried up.

 

Then I let it all out;
I said, “I’ll make a clean breast of my failures to God.”

 

Suddenly the pressure was gone—
my guilt dissolved,
my sin disappeared.

 

These things add up. Every one of us needs to pray;
when all hell breaks loose and the dam bursts
we’ll be on high ground, untouched.

 

Then I turn to the pain that are so strong the burning and electricity in my hurt so bad in my hips or legs what then will I do. I must turn to the lord – I Listened as I was reading  the Bible tells us of light and of dark, but never anything but the truth.  I believed my pain would find an end through Psalm 77:1-2  not what you would think but it rested my soul.

 

1 I cried out to God for help;

 

   I cried out to God to hear me.

 

When I was in distress, I sought the Lord

 

    at night I stretched out untiring hands,

 

    and I would not be comforted.

 

     God He is the only one who can hear me – He will hold me tight all will come to fruition.

 

God – The reason I am able to overcome obstacles and yet, the closer I come to him the serpent in all his glory – He has glory for he is able to turn those bound for Christ to him (So Sad). Today was a day I needed God to carry me on his shoulders, rather I needed Him to carry me in His arms.  I kept tripping falling over and over, the same obstacle the same plank in my eye.  For as much as I thought I will survive this I am stronger than any pain.  Pain is not real just a system of nerve responses to stimuli that attack from the world around us.  I wanted a shower, I wanted to take my husband on a mini date –  go get a little snack from the store then watch NCIS together.  This was my surprise. I put the wheelchair in the corner folded up and forgotten – I need you know more, my children had their dinner and a movie to watch.  I said give me a few minutes and I’ll come sit with you.  Two minutes into the shower my daughter wants to know if she can help me because Dad called he’s on his way home and the sweet girl she was she let dad know I was upstairs on my own – the #1 no-no for Jenn.  No more passing out.  No more hurting myself. I claimed a pacifist  yet there are moments I want to shave my head and punch my face in.

 

 

So that’s my story Go let the serpent play with me today as Job, to see if I would hold strong to Him and overcome this adversity.  So what do I do I take it out on everyone and everything I can see for at least and hour.  I became that vision of a person I had put in a box and promised never to let out.

 

The only way to overcome the feeling of loneliness, separated from your family, separated from your God.  IS GOD

 

The only way to find a door out of the screaming in your head and the will of perfection is GOD, Your Heavenly Father – The Holy Almighty!, Lord of Lords, King of Kings, Yahweh! and knower of all things great and small! I want to run God let’s satan give us that notion. If we are old enough to have children we know no matter where you go your problems follow. Hard Lesson but oh so true! –

 

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2 (NIV)

 

It is time to reach for the word renewed inch by inch – fall down get up not by the Father, I must surrender completely, repetitively . Get back in the machine, persevere until they find the reason for your neurological pain.  God’s timing is not mine!!!! God I don’t understand but forgive, Love you for your timing it always brings Glory!  He will in His time make me the Beauty he wants me! For His Glory this is me, Broken, but steadfast!! Therefore let my mind be cleansed as with ethanol to a wound keep it from fearing the just the intimacy forgotten – Satan has been Rebuked from my soul~Amen

 

God please use me to share your word with as many people as possible so that I may carry out what you set out for me to do in this condition.  For all the people lifting me up, Thank you is not enough. You are the true disciples of our Father

 

 

Yahweh! Please  send me words of encouragement, come, come I will serve you tea, I will wash your feet, for I am no better than our Father.  I Know I need two or more gathered together so our God will be with us and in us as we pray.

 

May God Carry me – Bessings~Jenn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today, just getting through it little by little…

 

I found a quote today while I was reading my bible, it really infected me, down to my soul.

“A Shimmering Quality”
“Just thinking about Eden sometimes gives me an ache in my chest. I find myself wondering about the pure and shimmering quality of life there that somehow slipped through our finger.
Just picture it. It was nothing to begin with. Nothing. And then God opened his mouth and spoke, and when he did, everything started taking shape. He used his words to make a world! He called forth forces of symmetry and beauty and great power. He laid boundaries of order and balance and proportion. With the precision of a master clockmaker he set in motion the weights and wheels of a perfect creation. And then, seeing the beauty of his own handiwork, he proclaimed with pride, “Good. Good.” And “Very good.” Light, darkness, sky, land, water, winds and tides; plants, trees, sun, moon, stars and planets. And animals flying, soaring, swimming, loping, crawling, galloping. All things in their vast array he created.
Then finally he created human beings, both male and female his shinning glory, whom he put in charge of it all. “Claire Cloninger”

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Its amazing that God in all his infinite wisdom, chose us; Male and Female to be in charge of all of creation. – “All of Creation” not just a section but rather the whole. DO you know anyone in your life who takes the responsibility in so much that it is as given with a pure heart to make sure this world we live in is “taken care of” in a manner that would be pleasing to God?

I Dont!

He also in that decision gave that responsibility to “Us” “Male and Female.” The role of working in a symbiotic relationship with the opposite sex.  Not just the opposite sex, rather the person God created for you, as he created Eve for Adam!

I Have my mate that I believe God intended for me, I don’t know that we have ever spoken to the question: what are we doing with our responsibility to keep this creation by our Heavenly father, one that is pleasing to Him. Have we listened to God? Have we Daughters and Sons of Christ, listened to to the first instructions he gave us? I think we have left that as a frightening question that we believe does not pertain to us.

This creation starting with Eden is the place we should all long to accomplish, together with our spouse, our “male and female”, feed our souls with love, take in the word and place it in the parts of our union only we can reach. He made each of us for each other he made the process of making and keeping Eden for each of us.  We read it.  We believe it, so why don’t we act. Perhaps we feel it is not for those of us. To recreate Eden in our lives, whatever that may look like to each of us.

To some of us Eden May be making it through school and helping others everyday by being a doctor who cares. Taking time to make sure that God is invited into the surgery, lab, MRI, CT, Chest Scan or radiation infusion area before starting a procedure.

To some Eden may be the words God whispers in their ear loud enough that they are able to write a novel that with the proper visibility will change lives. So many authors go through the thorns and branches of the fallen world. Only to find the place where Eden is hidden. Though when they find it, the breath and miracles that form through their words are undeniable.

Today I was given the chance to find my eden – It is partially the photo of the Married couple, for my spouse makes my life a series of blessings upon blessings. Never a moment goes by that I doubt his undying love for me. He holds me hand as I scream for something to make the fire in my leg stop, knowing it is just my neurological system and it is just a waiting game. He covers my face with a wet wash cloth when I am so cold that I know I am going to freeze to death. Have you seen anyone so loving that he helps me make my all fruit and veggie shakes so I can lose weight and help keep my muscles moving. He calls me to make sure I am up for the kids, then sneaks home my favorite chocolate and peanut butter ice cream from Basken-Robbins?

Then I thought of my Eden as the call I am waiting for, or the Church that gave me hope that they were going to come help me reboot my spiritual journey.  Or the idea of taking this five year journey and scrap-booking it in a white book with black pages. Then I remembered I took the wheelchair for an adventure three days ago, I tried to climb the driveway to send a letter.  I called out first, checking to see if there was anyone there to help me along the way. No so off i went.  I made it to a part of the grass in front of the red truck.  Five cars passed, including a black minivan all watching, the girl in the wheelchair climbing a straight up driveway with no power, a mount Everest with a tee shirt on. I had blistered my hands and although stuck, I was not giving in.  Then came the neighbor girl, she just pulled in and immediately ran over. “How can i help you”. “Please place this in the mail.” Let’s get you safe first.” “No, please just put this in the mail, I can hold on.” I did and together we made it back to the house, where I decided, that was not an adventure I would take again – guess I am not running to the store on my own anytime soon.

That was it I found my Eden, it was not given to a woman, to write a novel that changes the world, a political leader that in His own way tries to accomplish the unattainable.  It is not the research in ten different countries backed by Millions of pre-tax dollars striving to fix the energy crisis we have found our self in because we did not read.  The Bible told us how to live, to survive, to find Eden here on earth again and in doing so learn more about ourselves.  We are too Free Willed for creating what we were born to create! We had to separate everything into “theirs and ours”. We question the reality of our circumstances and then spend a lifetime creating a world that in itself will be the death of us.

I found my Eden, in my spouse, my love for life, my belief that God will find a way to create a man and a woman who will together give us the change and chance at living once again, all we have to do is take it.  I will.  Will You?

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